Anything in life that is worth doing involves risk. It is only in facing the possibility of failure that we see the potential for accomplishments. Those who take the risk tend to have the achievements, those who don't are more likely to not like where they end up. This is a greater indicator of success than intelligence or skill. Some risk most people are willing to take, like learning to drive, but others can be more daunting. Obviously I am not suggested people take unreasonable risks, but that people need to pursue their hopes and dreams if they wish to achieve them.
When I started college I was terrified that I wouldn't be smart enough. Even though I had done quite well in high school with fairly little effort, somehow this new environment would prove that all of that was a sham. I had built my identity around my intelligence, I'd never been skilled and wasn't very well liked, so I pinned all of my self worth on my intellect. One class in, and this fear went away. If I hadn't gone, I would have always questioned whether I was good enough. Sadly, as I consider pursuing further education, the same fears arise. If I give into those fears, I create a state of perpetual self-doubt, it is only through pursuing the things you fear that you can move forward.
These fears that paralyze us are not real. I don't think anyone else is questioning my intelligence, but because it matters to me, the fear arises. We create stories to justify our feelings. If I fail this time, I will know for the rest of my life that I wasn't good enough. In reality we are more haunted by the things we were too scared to do. We can handle a potential failure, it just means we need to try something else. The key is not to pin your identity or self-worth on whether you succeed or fail. In either case, you are still the same person afterward.
We live in a culture that is not comfortable with admitting fear, which I think makes it all the harder to deal with. If I know everyone feels the same fears as me, and has to be brave enough to push through anyway, that encourages me to be willing to try too. Unfortunately, showing any sign of weakness tends to be looked down upon. Why do you think that 70-80% of people dislike what they do? They are afraid to chase their dreams. What is worse, they feel alone in their fear. Well, you are not alone, I live with fear every day. It is the thing that made me a loner growing up. It made me wait three years to start college. It made me switch my major from History to Business, for fear of not finding a job. At many points in my life I have let fear win, and I refused to act, but in doing so I automatically failed. I have to make an effort to override these tendencies, because they can come so naturally. Feeling fear is nothing to be ashamed of, because so does everyone else. Just don't let it ruin your life.
Courage is not a lack of fear, but the willingness to act anyway. If I could give you any advice, I'd tell you to be brave in the pursuit of what you want. Remember that others feel it to, even if they won't admit it. You will never fail yourself so much as when you don't try. Don't see yourself through the eyes of fear, that is not who you are, it only a story. Who you are is much more than this event, and you can accomplish much more than you imagine.
Wednesday, September 28, 2016
Thursday, August 18, 2016
I Am A Reconstructed Mirror
I have not posted on here for quite some time, but I'd like to get back into the habit. So, I thought what better way than to discuss the name of my blog. Why a Reconstructed Mirror?
A mirror provides a reflection, a way for us to view ourselves objectively. Unfortunately, we don't tend to see ourselves objectively, physically or mentally. We all have our issues, but our society convinces us that we should hide them. Maybe if we look and act perfect, we almost can be. The problem is, if we brush our problems under the proverbial carpet, they will only fester. There are so many expectations we feel compelled to meet and standards we are expected to uphold. When we look in the mirror, we begin to see what we are trying to be, not what we truly are. We have convinced ourselves that what we pretend is who we are. Then we don't understand why we are unhappy. We are unhappy because we are untrue to ourselves, broken.
The Reconstructed Mirror then, is seeing how we are broken and putting ourselves back together, in a truer more authentic way. Whether we feel broken and have problems that need resolved or we feel we are living an inauthentic life, we need to put ourselves back together.
It isn't easy, but finding our true self is far too important. Do we really want to live our entire lives by someone else's standards? We should be doing what we love and being with the people that love and respect us. We should have opinions that are our own, not just a surrogate from someone else. We need to be proud of who we are and stand for what we believe. There should be no shame in being ourselves, after all we are all uniquely ourselves.
When we Reconstruct the Mirror, we see our true selves for the first time, and we stand taller and prouder. We no longer have to justify our existence or place in this world, it is ours.
A mirror provides a reflection, a way for us to view ourselves objectively. Unfortunately, we don't tend to see ourselves objectively, physically or mentally. We all have our issues, but our society convinces us that we should hide them. Maybe if we look and act perfect, we almost can be. The problem is, if we brush our problems under the proverbial carpet, they will only fester. There are so many expectations we feel compelled to meet and standards we are expected to uphold. When we look in the mirror, we begin to see what we are trying to be, not what we truly are. We have convinced ourselves that what we pretend is who we are. Then we don't understand why we are unhappy. We are unhappy because we are untrue to ourselves, broken.
The Reconstructed Mirror then, is seeing how we are broken and putting ourselves back together, in a truer more authentic way. Whether we feel broken and have problems that need resolved or we feel we are living an inauthentic life, we need to put ourselves back together.
It isn't easy, but finding our true self is far too important. Do we really want to live our entire lives by someone else's standards? We should be doing what we love and being with the people that love and respect us. We should have opinions that are our own, not just a surrogate from someone else. We need to be proud of who we are and stand for what we believe. There should be no shame in being ourselves, after all we are all uniquely ourselves.
When we Reconstruct the Mirror, we see our true selves for the first time, and we stand taller and prouder. We no longer have to justify our existence or place in this world, it is ours.
Thursday, February 12, 2015
Groundhog Day
I've always enjoyed the movie Groundhog Day, so on Feb 2 I decided to watch it for obvious reasons. While watching it, I realized what I like about the movie so much. It is more than just a romantic comedy about someone changing for love. It is about the stages of development he went through. I think it is the skill with which they navigate these stages that gives the film its value.
The character at the beginning of the story is self-absorbed, manipulative and immature. All he is aware of is what he wants, with absolutely no concern for anyone else. Phil expects the whole world to serve him, and he is oblivious to those in real need. His character hides behind sarcasm instead of engaging the world around him honestly.
When things start to repeat, he first reacts with denial. Obviously this would be the most normal reaction to one's days repeating. He is both surprised and suspicious. It is only after overcoming denial and facing the dilemma that we are able to progress. In this case, recognizing the problem led him to displaying the baser parts of his nature. Although this may seem bad, this step is required before any real growth can take place.
Upon embracing the situation, the character takes selfish advantage of the situation. As I would expect most people would he began to behave hedonistically. When one does not have to face consequences, the first thing people think of is what one can get away with. He robbed an armored truck, went on a police chase, punched the annoying guy, and took advantage of the pretty girl. It is a laundry list of things people wish they could do. After a time though, this grows old for him. He has done everything that seemed exciting, and found it unfulfilling. This helped him realize what he did want, and that was Rita. Unfortunately, being self-absorbed, he thought he could trick her into loving him or at least sleeping with him. All of his attempts to objectify her failed, and eventually after many many attempts, he gave up. This leads to the next step, depression.
Here he is stuck in a time loop, he knows what he wants, and he can't have it. Not knowing why, and frustrated, he becomes depressed and gives up. For an undefined period of time, he walks around like a shell of a man and loathes each repeating day. Seeing no way out, he attempts to kill himself multiple times and fails. This is a turning point for Phil, his ego is broken, and he has lost self-worth, but this step leads him to later re-examine his life. At the end of this stage, he tells Rita what has been happening. Although she doesn't entirely believe him, she finds the coincidences too many to deny. She decides to spend the day with him to see what happens. This is the first real day they spend together, and when he is not trying to take advantage of her, she actually likes him. When she falls asleep, he confesses that he doesn't feel worthy of her. This leads to the next step, self improvement.
Phil knows that he loves Rita, and this makes him want to be a better man. He sees what a kind and generous person she is and it leads to his improvement. First, we see altruism. He takes in a homeless man and tries to save him. When the man dies at the end of the night, he desperately tries to save him. He learns multiple skills, including ice sculpting and piano. He also spends a great deal of time reading and expanding his mind. This is a sincere change, he is longer thinking of himself and truly cares about other people. He is enjoying learning and wants to be a better person. Although Rita may have triggered this change, I believe that he truly wants to be a better man. He no longer acts like he is entitled and he no longer tries to prove anything to anyone. He has become someone worthy of Rita, which leads to the final repeat.
The last day is kind of a compilation of all the ways he has improved himself. He saves a kid falling from a tree, saves a man from choking, changes a flat tire for some elderly ladies, encourages a bride to go through with a wedding, and plays piano at the evening gala. He is suddenly the most popular person in town. This is very confusing for Rita, but Phil downplays all the attention. When they do a bachelor auction, Rita empties her purse to win him. He carves a statue of her in ice, and she is both stunned and flattered. Phil's statement is very important, he says, "Whatever happens tomorrow, or for the rest of my life, I'm happy now... because I love you." He is ready to embrace life in the now, and let life be. He is beyond trying to control it, and just accepts the happiness that is. The next day, the unthinkable happens, Feb 3 comes. He leaves his room hopeful about the future with Rita.
There can be many critiques of this film. Some would simplify it by calling it a comedy or romance. Some would critique Bill Murray as an actor. Although, I'm not typically a fan of his movies, I love this one. And although it is definitely a comedic romance, I think the psychological aspect is much more important. In real life, we can't see this kind of character development. Only through the constantly repeating day, do we see his progression. He is unable to continue gliding through life, and is forced to face himself. When considering all of his experiences, he must have spent multiple years in this repeating day. This providing a lot of time for introspection. Facing himself was not easy, he had to go through his own "dark night of the soul", but the process eventually transformed his life.
There is much we can learn from this film. First of all, leading a self-absorbed hedonistic life is not fulfilling. Also, often growth requires pain. You must first break down the old, before you can create the new. He could not become a better person while remaining self-absorbed. The loss of self-worth allowed him to rethink the kind of man he wanted to be. As the movie points out, when he was self absorbed, nobody cared, he was a nobody. When he actually cared about people and helped them, he became the most beloved person in town. Also, self-improvement creates a real sense of self-worth, one that does not require outside recognition. Lastly, love or admiration can often lead to self-improvement. It was recognizing how much he loved Rita, and why, that led to his improvement. Seeing a role model for what kind of person he wanted to be, gave him something to aspire to. Often love is dismissed as a meaningful means of growth, but this is unfair. In truth all great things come from love, be it love of knowledge, love of freedom, love of science, or love of another person or people. Love is a catalyst that can undo much of the damage that accumulates from insecurity, anger and fear.
If you haven't seen this film, I'd recommend it. Hopefully you will find it as inspiring as I did.
Hopefully you like Sonny and Cher, cause "I've Got You Babe"!
The character at the beginning of the story is self-absorbed, manipulative and immature. All he is aware of is what he wants, with absolutely no concern for anyone else. Phil expects the whole world to serve him, and he is oblivious to those in real need. His character hides behind sarcasm instead of engaging the world around him honestly.
When things start to repeat, he first reacts with denial. Obviously this would be the most normal reaction to one's days repeating. He is both surprised and suspicious. It is only after overcoming denial and facing the dilemma that we are able to progress. In this case, recognizing the problem led him to displaying the baser parts of his nature. Although this may seem bad, this step is required before any real growth can take place.
Upon embracing the situation, the character takes selfish advantage of the situation. As I would expect most people would he began to behave hedonistically. When one does not have to face consequences, the first thing people think of is what one can get away with. He robbed an armored truck, went on a police chase, punched the annoying guy, and took advantage of the pretty girl. It is a laundry list of things people wish they could do. After a time though, this grows old for him. He has done everything that seemed exciting, and found it unfulfilling. This helped him realize what he did want, and that was Rita. Unfortunately, being self-absorbed, he thought he could trick her into loving him or at least sleeping with him. All of his attempts to objectify her failed, and eventually after many many attempts, he gave up. This leads to the next step, depression.
Here he is stuck in a time loop, he knows what he wants, and he can't have it. Not knowing why, and frustrated, he becomes depressed and gives up. For an undefined period of time, he walks around like a shell of a man and loathes each repeating day. Seeing no way out, he attempts to kill himself multiple times and fails. This is a turning point for Phil, his ego is broken, and he has lost self-worth, but this step leads him to later re-examine his life. At the end of this stage, he tells Rita what has been happening. Although she doesn't entirely believe him, she finds the coincidences too many to deny. She decides to spend the day with him to see what happens. This is the first real day they spend together, and when he is not trying to take advantage of her, she actually likes him. When she falls asleep, he confesses that he doesn't feel worthy of her. This leads to the next step, self improvement.
Phil knows that he loves Rita, and this makes him want to be a better man. He sees what a kind and generous person she is and it leads to his improvement. First, we see altruism. He takes in a homeless man and tries to save him. When the man dies at the end of the night, he desperately tries to save him. He learns multiple skills, including ice sculpting and piano. He also spends a great deal of time reading and expanding his mind. This is a sincere change, he is longer thinking of himself and truly cares about other people. He is enjoying learning and wants to be a better person. Although Rita may have triggered this change, I believe that he truly wants to be a better man. He no longer acts like he is entitled and he no longer tries to prove anything to anyone. He has become someone worthy of Rita, which leads to the final repeat.
The last day is kind of a compilation of all the ways he has improved himself. He saves a kid falling from a tree, saves a man from choking, changes a flat tire for some elderly ladies, encourages a bride to go through with a wedding, and plays piano at the evening gala. He is suddenly the most popular person in town. This is very confusing for Rita, but Phil downplays all the attention. When they do a bachelor auction, Rita empties her purse to win him. He carves a statue of her in ice, and she is both stunned and flattered. Phil's statement is very important, he says, "Whatever happens tomorrow, or for the rest of my life, I'm happy now... because I love you." He is ready to embrace life in the now, and let life be. He is beyond trying to control it, and just accepts the happiness that is. The next day, the unthinkable happens, Feb 3 comes. He leaves his room hopeful about the future with Rita.
There can be many critiques of this film. Some would simplify it by calling it a comedy or romance. Some would critique Bill Murray as an actor. Although, I'm not typically a fan of his movies, I love this one. And although it is definitely a comedic romance, I think the psychological aspect is much more important. In real life, we can't see this kind of character development. Only through the constantly repeating day, do we see his progression. He is unable to continue gliding through life, and is forced to face himself. When considering all of his experiences, he must have spent multiple years in this repeating day. This providing a lot of time for introspection. Facing himself was not easy, he had to go through his own "dark night of the soul", but the process eventually transformed his life.
There is much we can learn from this film. First of all, leading a self-absorbed hedonistic life is not fulfilling. Also, often growth requires pain. You must first break down the old, before you can create the new. He could not become a better person while remaining self-absorbed. The loss of self-worth allowed him to rethink the kind of man he wanted to be. As the movie points out, when he was self absorbed, nobody cared, he was a nobody. When he actually cared about people and helped them, he became the most beloved person in town. Also, self-improvement creates a real sense of self-worth, one that does not require outside recognition. Lastly, love or admiration can often lead to self-improvement. It was recognizing how much he loved Rita, and why, that led to his improvement. Seeing a role model for what kind of person he wanted to be, gave him something to aspire to. Often love is dismissed as a meaningful means of growth, but this is unfair. In truth all great things come from love, be it love of knowledge, love of freedom, love of science, or love of another person or people. Love is a catalyst that can undo much of the damage that accumulates from insecurity, anger and fear.
If you haven't seen this film, I'd recommend it. Hopefully you will find it as inspiring as I did.
Hopefully you like Sonny and Cher, cause "I've Got You Babe"!
Sunday, February 1, 2015
Paradigms
Since much of what I will likely discuss on here concerns paradigms, it seems suitable as my first topic of discussion. According to vocabulary.com, "A paradigm is a standard, perspective, or set of ideas. A paradigm is a way of looking at something." Paradigms are a status quo of sorts, based on what most people think or have thought. They are not based on fact. To be fair, very few people have the time or interest in researching for themselves where a paradigm comes from or if it is factual. With work and family and all of our other obligations, we rarely have time to sit down and think, let alone do research. This does not lessen the importance of paradigms and how they impact our future.
Where do these paradigms come from? Multiple sources exist, but I believe the most prevalent are: parents, schools, media and religious organizations. Obviously, we tend to favor the perspectives taught to us as children, especially from parents. Children come into the world knowing nothing, they must trust those close to them to teach them what they need to know. In the past, such trust (especially in parents) was vital to survival. Thus children are very trusting, and are not quick to question what they are told. Where do parents get their beliefs/standards? Usually from the sources listed above. Typically they do not question things until their adolescent years, which brings the schools into this. If the school is teaching what is status quo, the child will miss an opportunity to question the paradigms that may have already been proven to be wrong. Thus the school has a greater responsibility to be up to date, and not just follow old paradigms. Of course, it is not all up to the educators, in many cases they are told ahead of time what they are allowed to teach, with no regard for accuracy. Luckily, for those who are able to go to college, the education system is less regulated at these levels. Because it is college, the professors are more likely to have the most recent research and discoveries. But, it is estimated that only 20-25% of the American population graduates from college, meaning many people are not exposed to this information. For those who are, given the human psyche, they may revert to what they learned in their youth. As we all know, many people base their beliefs on what their favorite media source tells them. After all, if you can't trust them, who knows what you can believe? Unfortunately, the media is rarely without bias. They tend to support a specific party, cause or belief system. When we add in religious influence, we get one more layer built onto the expected beliefs that build a paradigm. Beliefs can be interpreted in hundreds of different ways, and can be many times harmful. When a belief denies science or the fundamental rights of another, it needs to change. From what I've seen, all major religions are susceptible to these wrong ways of thinking . What all this leads to is paradigms that are often blatantly wrong, but are supported to protect the beliefs that we have learned to depend upon. What's more, those who would dare challenge these paradigms are mocked, belittled, shunned and even attacked. It is clear that many of our current paradigms are as wrong as ones we have replaced in the past, they have already been proven so, just people aren't ready to let go. Unfortunately, if we hold on to them too long, they may be our collective undoing.
How long does it take for a paradigm to change? In my experience, I would suggest approximately twenty years. The reason being, new paradigms are introduced in our youth. Any new idea doesn't entirely take with adults. Even if they are considered or believed by an adult, a person's heart is usually more swayed but what they learned in their youth. And as stated above, most people don't change their beliefs after childhood. Although there are multiple sources of new memes that could become the new paradigm, I think the most common is colleges and universities. They are typically more willing to consider new evidence and challenge the old paradigms. Also, teachers come from these schools, and thus they are the source for new information trickling down into high schools and elementary schools. Until the new memes are being presented to the youth, the old paradigms will hold. My generation will most likely not deny the reality of global warming, just as I expect the current youth would consider discrimination based on sexual orientation to be unacceptable. This does not mean that other people wouldn't also change their beliefs on old paradigms, but a paradigm is the widely accepted belief.
A paradigm never entirely takes over, it will never be 100%. This is not bad though, ideas should always have dissenters, they should always be questioned. But unfortunately some antiquated ideas still persist. Some people actually believe the world is flat, although not a significant group, it does show that most ideas will not totally go away. Some old memes such as racism can be very destructive and require a civilizations constant diligence to keep them in check. But don't forget, the denial of evolution and global warming are not without harm also. Evolution is necessary to understand where we are and where we've been. It is necessary in medicine to understand why our bodies function the way they do, and even why we think the way we do. It also is a reminder that our place on this planet is not a given. With the denial of global warming, we actually are threatening our future existence. Luckily, the trends are leading to greater social and environmental responsibility.
If we can survive the tumultuous time that we are currently living in, I believe we are on the cusp of one of the brightest times in human history. A world that we protect for future generations and other species. We are seeing the advancement of amazing technology. Within the next ten years I hope to see a huge move to solar power and electric cars. Both are becoming cheaper and much more dependable. As I type this, BMW and Volkswagen are planning to built electric car charging stations up both US coasts capable of charging a car to 80% in twenty minutes. With the advancement of electronic media, we will also create less waste. With things such as streaming video and audio, (common examples include Netflix, Pandora and iTunes) people are cutting down on the need for things such as dvds, cds, books and magazines. Medical technology is making amazing strides. Within the next 10-20 years, I think we will see the curing of most chronic and genetic diseases. Also, governments are starting to see the importance of college education to a larger percentage of the population, offering this education to its citizens free of charge. Germany has already done this, and the US has discussed offering this starting at the community college level. I believe this development, along with the greater connection offered by the internet, could lead to much faster advancement of new paradigms.
We must face the future with bravery, and not be afraid to question our beliefs. Only through diligent consideration can we lead the way to a brighter future. It will be on us to verify the ethics of new developments too, just because we can doesn't mean we should. We must be careful with the power that is increasingly at our fingertips. That said, we must also not be afraid to move forward. What is sure, we can't continue as we are. For us and the world to survive, we must be willing to change the paradigm. If we do, we still have a chance to create a more ethical, renewable and dynamic world. It could be an exciting world to live in.
It is up to us.
Where do these paradigms come from? Multiple sources exist, but I believe the most prevalent are: parents, schools, media and religious organizations. Obviously, we tend to favor the perspectives taught to us as children, especially from parents. Children come into the world knowing nothing, they must trust those close to them to teach them what they need to know. In the past, such trust (especially in parents) was vital to survival. Thus children are very trusting, and are not quick to question what they are told. Where do parents get their beliefs/standards? Usually from the sources listed above. Typically they do not question things until their adolescent years, which brings the schools into this. If the school is teaching what is status quo, the child will miss an opportunity to question the paradigms that may have already been proven to be wrong. Thus the school has a greater responsibility to be up to date, and not just follow old paradigms. Of course, it is not all up to the educators, in many cases they are told ahead of time what they are allowed to teach, with no regard for accuracy. Luckily, for those who are able to go to college, the education system is less regulated at these levels. Because it is college, the professors are more likely to have the most recent research and discoveries. But, it is estimated that only 20-25% of the American population graduates from college, meaning many people are not exposed to this information. For those who are, given the human psyche, they may revert to what they learned in their youth. As we all know, many people base their beliefs on what their favorite media source tells them. After all, if you can't trust them, who knows what you can believe? Unfortunately, the media is rarely without bias. They tend to support a specific party, cause or belief system. When we add in religious influence, we get one more layer built onto the expected beliefs that build a paradigm. Beliefs can be interpreted in hundreds of different ways, and can be many times harmful. When a belief denies science or the fundamental rights of another, it needs to change. From what I've seen, all major religions are susceptible to these wrong ways of thinking . What all this leads to is paradigms that are often blatantly wrong, but are supported to protect the beliefs that we have learned to depend upon. What's more, those who would dare challenge these paradigms are mocked, belittled, shunned and even attacked. It is clear that many of our current paradigms are as wrong as ones we have replaced in the past, they have already been proven so, just people aren't ready to let go. Unfortunately, if we hold on to them too long, they may be our collective undoing.
How long does it take for a paradigm to change? In my experience, I would suggest approximately twenty years. The reason being, new paradigms are introduced in our youth. Any new idea doesn't entirely take with adults. Even if they are considered or believed by an adult, a person's heart is usually more swayed but what they learned in their youth. And as stated above, most people don't change their beliefs after childhood. Although there are multiple sources of new memes that could become the new paradigm, I think the most common is colleges and universities. They are typically more willing to consider new evidence and challenge the old paradigms. Also, teachers come from these schools, and thus they are the source for new information trickling down into high schools and elementary schools. Until the new memes are being presented to the youth, the old paradigms will hold. My generation will most likely not deny the reality of global warming, just as I expect the current youth would consider discrimination based on sexual orientation to be unacceptable. This does not mean that other people wouldn't also change their beliefs on old paradigms, but a paradigm is the widely accepted belief.
A paradigm never entirely takes over, it will never be 100%. This is not bad though, ideas should always have dissenters, they should always be questioned. But unfortunately some antiquated ideas still persist. Some people actually believe the world is flat, although not a significant group, it does show that most ideas will not totally go away. Some old memes such as racism can be very destructive and require a civilizations constant diligence to keep them in check. But don't forget, the denial of evolution and global warming are not without harm also. Evolution is necessary to understand where we are and where we've been. It is necessary in medicine to understand why our bodies function the way they do, and even why we think the way we do. It also is a reminder that our place on this planet is not a given. With the denial of global warming, we actually are threatening our future existence. Luckily, the trends are leading to greater social and environmental responsibility.
If we can survive the tumultuous time that we are currently living in, I believe we are on the cusp of one of the brightest times in human history. A world that we protect for future generations and other species. We are seeing the advancement of amazing technology. Within the next ten years I hope to see a huge move to solar power and electric cars. Both are becoming cheaper and much more dependable. As I type this, BMW and Volkswagen are planning to built electric car charging stations up both US coasts capable of charging a car to 80% in twenty minutes. With the advancement of electronic media, we will also create less waste. With things such as streaming video and audio, (common examples include Netflix, Pandora and iTunes) people are cutting down on the need for things such as dvds, cds, books and magazines. Medical technology is making amazing strides. Within the next 10-20 years, I think we will see the curing of most chronic and genetic diseases. Also, governments are starting to see the importance of college education to a larger percentage of the population, offering this education to its citizens free of charge. Germany has already done this, and the US has discussed offering this starting at the community college level. I believe this development, along with the greater connection offered by the internet, could lead to much faster advancement of new paradigms.
We must face the future with bravery, and not be afraid to question our beliefs. Only through diligent consideration can we lead the way to a brighter future. It will be on us to verify the ethics of new developments too, just because we can doesn't mean we should. We must be careful with the power that is increasingly at our fingertips. That said, we must also not be afraid to move forward. What is sure, we can't continue as we are. For us and the world to survive, we must be willing to change the paradigm. If we do, we still have a chance to create a more ethical, renewable and dynamic world. It could be an exciting world to live in.
It is up to us.
Tuesday, January 20, 2015
Children's Dreams
I posted this to facebook in May 2014
Do you love your children?
I'm sure you do. Any decent parent would.
That said, may I make a suggestion? Possibly just a reminder.... Love them for who they are.
I think as parents, it can be too easy to get caught up in who you'd like your children to be. But, you must remember, they do not belong to you. They have lives and dreams of their own. We have no right to impose ours on them. We had our chance to chase dreams, now it is theirs. It's okay if they dream differently than you, it doesn't have to be something you are interested in. Be interested because they are. Share in their excitement, with a little guidance to help them along their way. Maybe it won't pan out, but that isn't what matters. What matters is that you have showed your faith in them. More than any dream or specific journey, they need to know that you believe in them. That faith will give them the strength and confidence to achieve more than any dictated path ever would. As a bonus, with you on their side, maybe they will listen when you offer advice that would help them avoid the bigger mistakes. You can still be a voice of reason. If you try to seize control, they will just make bigger mistakes when you aren't looking.
That doesn't mean you aren't a parent. Clearly there are times when a line must be drawn. To never set limitations would be clearly irresponsible. I only ask that you don't tread on their dreams.
If you can be their biggest fan, and believe in all the possibilities of what they can be, they will go higher and achieve more because of that confidence. Go along for the ride, and see how high they can fly. I can't think of anything more exciting.
If you love your children, you have to give them the chance to be. Even if it isn't how you planned it. See the beauty in their dreams.
Do you love your children?
I'm sure you do. Any decent parent would.
That said, may I make a suggestion? Possibly just a reminder.... Love them for who they are.
I think as parents, it can be too easy to get caught up in who you'd like your children to be. But, you must remember, they do not belong to you. They have lives and dreams of their own. We have no right to impose ours on them. We had our chance to chase dreams, now it is theirs. It's okay if they dream differently than you, it doesn't have to be something you are interested in. Be interested because they are. Share in their excitement, with a little guidance to help them along their way. Maybe it won't pan out, but that isn't what matters. What matters is that you have showed your faith in them. More than any dream or specific journey, they need to know that you believe in them. That faith will give them the strength and confidence to achieve more than any dictated path ever would. As a bonus, with you on their side, maybe they will listen when you offer advice that would help them avoid the bigger mistakes. You can still be a voice of reason. If you try to seize control, they will just make bigger mistakes when you aren't looking.
That doesn't mean you aren't a parent. Clearly there are times when a line must be drawn. To never set limitations would be clearly irresponsible. I only ask that you don't tread on their dreams.
If you can be their biggest fan, and believe in all the possibilities of what they can be, they will go higher and achieve more because of that confidence. Go along for the ride, and see how high they can fly. I can't think of anything more exciting.
If you love your children, you have to give them the chance to be. Even if it isn't how you planned it. See the beauty in their dreams.
Remember the Moments...
I posted this on facebook in 2011, just before my second son, Quinn, was born...
Remember the Moments
May 26, 2011 at 1:45am
I remember a moment when I was 10, I was completely content to sit around a campfire, and it could have lasted forever. I remember the moment my wife smiled at me on our first date. I remember the moment I first saw my son's face when he was born. I will remember the moments that my son laughs with an abandon I have long forgotten. I will experience multiple other moments as my children grow, and even later when they have families of their own. Any given moment is so fragmentally brief, sometimes only an instant. Any plans made will quickly approach, be done, and before I know it only be a memory . In a moment I will be gone and a memory to someone else, and then lost in the passage of time. But if I miss these moments, no matter how brief, I have missed all that matters. If I give in to the constant flicker of time, and succumb to planning, worry and regret, I may miss incredible moments. I can never be too busy or preoccupied to appreciate the special moments of life.
Why Do A Blog?
For a while now, I have considered doing a blog. There are many reasons people may do a blog, such as to share an interest, bring attention to an important cause, or just share things about themselves. I can't say that any of these exactly express why I decided to do one. For me, a blog is a way for me to express my ideas, and potentially to receive feedback. I am not looking for converts and I don't expect people to necessarily agree with me. I do hope that the things I share will encourage people to think, and maybe consider why they think what they do about something.
I know I am getting old when I think about how much the world has changed during my life. When I was young there was no widely used internet and no easy way to get one's ideas out to the world. If you wanted to say something, you either wrote a letter or attended some sort of meeting or convention. In high school, I remember the fad was carrying around pagers. It wasn't until about the time that I graduated (97), that the internet really started to become prevalent. I remember around the time of the new millennium, spending a lot of time in chat rooms and IMing people. Looking back, it was all pretty pointless and rarely resulted in any real conversations. After that, I moved to message boards. At least I could pick a topic, read and respond. I could follow a topic and respond to it, much better than chat rooms with wanderlust conversations. Nonetheless, even message boards were difficult to keep up with. An active board would have so many post, many rehashing prior comments. After all, nobody would actually go back and read everything that has been already said. Thus, they also became increasingly tiresome. As of late, my main connection has been facebook. It allowed me to connect with people I haven't seen in years, and also to follow and support topics that interest me. But, even though it allows me to share post and to make short comments, it is not the same as actually putting MY ideas down. A blog allows me to be more thorough and to also have a record of all the things I've written for future reference.
We are more connected than ever. Never before could we express ourselves to an international audience. Anyone in the world can see and comment via our social media outlets. We can follow news from anywhere in the world, and even order exotic items via online shopping. People play video games online and even make friends through these connections. We are in a time when we can be better friends with someone we never met via the internet, than the person in our neighborhood. I'm not in favor of the loss of local community , but I do think there is much to be gained from the online connections that allow us to reach a larger audience. It is only now, with this new medium, that anyone can raise their voice and be heard.
If you know me, you know that I have many thoughts, and I'd like the opportunity to express them. You may not agree with me, but I think you will find them thought provoking. And if so, please share your thoughts with me. I love a good conversation.
I know I am getting old when I think about how much the world has changed during my life. When I was young there was no widely used internet and no easy way to get one's ideas out to the world. If you wanted to say something, you either wrote a letter or attended some sort of meeting or convention. In high school, I remember the fad was carrying around pagers. It wasn't until about the time that I graduated (97), that the internet really started to become prevalent. I remember around the time of the new millennium, spending a lot of time in chat rooms and IMing people. Looking back, it was all pretty pointless and rarely resulted in any real conversations. After that, I moved to message boards. At least I could pick a topic, read and respond. I could follow a topic and respond to it, much better than chat rooms with wanderlust conversations. Nonetheless, even message boards were difficult to keep up with. An active board would have so many post, many rehashing prior comments. After all, nobody would actually go back and read everything that has been already said. Thus, they also became increasingly tiresome. As of late, my main connection has been facebook. It allowed me to connect with people I haven't seen in years, and also to follow and support topics that interest me. But, even though it allows me to share post and to make short comments, it is not the same as actually putting MY ideas down. A blog allows me to be more thorough and to also have a record of all the things I've written for future reference.
We are more connected than ever. Never before could we express ourselves to an international audience. Anyone in the world can see and comment via our social media outlets. We can follow news from anywhere in the world, and even order exotic items via online shopping. People play video games online and even make friends through these connections. We are in a time when we can be better friends with someone we never met via the internet, than the person in our neighborhood. I'm not in favor of the loss of local community , but I do think there is much to be gained from the online connections that allow us to reach a larger audience. It is only now, with this new medium, that anyone can raise their voice and be heard.
If you know me, you know that I have many thoughts, and I'd like the opportunity to express them. You may not agree with me, but I think you will find them thought provoking. And if so, please share your thoughts with me. I love a good conversation.
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